Random randomness and then some tunes

Friday, May 22, 2009

"When Gary told me he had found Jesus I thought, Yahoo! We're rich! But, it turned out to be something different." - Jack Handy, SNL


Church with Moxie has become an athletic event for me. She races up and down the hall as fast as she possibly can. Last week, I spent all of Sacrament Meeting out in the hall seriously wondering why I was even there. Then I had an epiphany.

I was there because the furniture in the lobby needed re-arranging. And so I did. Re-arrange the furniture, that is.

I tried to do it quickly, so that no one would notice my crazy lady, Estelle, that had just reared her ugly beautiful head. But, Estelle, she's crazy like that, and just couldn't take it any longer.

The sofa was on one side of the lobby, not centered under the gigantic portrait of the Savior. There was a side table and chair on the other wall, not lined up under the other portraits in the building. Estelle was going wacko. I had to do something to calm her shut her up.

You see, Estelle? Yeah. She totally makes me do stupid stuff. Really. It's all Estelle's fault that I re-arranged the furniture in the lobby of the church. During the Sacrament.


*****

I have a confession. Shocker, huh? I think most of the Fan pages on Facebook are stupid. I mean really, who isn't a fan of breathing? If you're not, then you're dead. You're a fan of being alive? Really? Well, I would certainly hope so.

Being a fan of sleeping is like broadcasting to the world "not only do I like to sleep, a lot, but I'm dang proud of it. Just call Mrs. Lazy bones. For short."

Who needs a fan page for eating? Really. You can tell I like to eat. Look at my shelf butt. But, do I want to broadcast that to the world? Umm. No. I mean, I already am, every time I walk through the Wal-martS-- which is what my FIL calls it. The Wal-martS.

Which leads rather nicely into my next weird random thought-- why oh why does my FIL say The Wal-martS? Are there two walmarts side by side? That way if one walmart is out of something, you can just mosey on over to the next walmart? I don't get it. The Wal-martS. That's just... well. Sort of hick-ish.

*****

I joke ALL THE TIME about my super sized Jedi Mind Power Skillz. I have some mad dog mind power skillz. Can you imagine my total glee when I saw this toy?

I'm totally getting it. And when I conquer the fooze-ball, I will then be able to conquer the world.

Muwah-hahahahahahaha!


*****

Walking at the butt-crack of dawn has its perks. One would think that perk would be that you could roll out of bed and just go walking, and not run into the entire neighborhood. Oh how wrong you would be if you thought that! In my neighborhood, everyone AND their dog is out walking at the butt-crack of dawn. Its a veritable neighborhood party out there. All we're missing is the grill and some naughty kids.

The other thing that is great about walking that early in the morning, besides that party, is that you can see whose sprinklers work, and whose don't. I feel rather evil when I walk by and see their sprinklers shooting an old faithful geyser into the air, or watering the same spot so as to create Lake Michigan in their front yard. I found myself actually giving an evil laugh. Isn't that awful? Especially when later, I see them out picking the mushrooms growing in their grass, shaking their head, wondering why oh why is this happening to me??

I laugh. Because I know.
And so would they. If they were up at the butt-crack of dawn.

*****

Every summer, and not by choice, I find a theme song. A song that just resonates with me and is our anthem for the summer. The first summer we had our pool, it was THIS song. We had XM radio, and would blast it out our windows while we lounged in the pool. I loved the song so much, that I went and bought all his albums (all 2 of them... it was 2001) I can't hear this song without smelling sunscreen.

Last summer it was this song. My kids actually know every single lyric to this song AND what songs he sampled to write this song (do you?) It came on the radio yesterday and Thing 3 sighed a heavy sigh and said: "It's our summer song Mom. I love this song!" Then, she proceeded to sing the song in its entirety... word perfect.

I am the best mother ever.

I have yet to find my summer anthem song yet. I'm starting to get a little worried. Will this be the summer of no anthem?

Do you have summer anthems?
If so what are they?

*****

It's a party weekend! Are you grilling? Tossing some flowers on some graves? Whatcha doin' this weekend?

I'm planning the event 'o summer! Our school gets out in a week, so my neighbor and I are planning a huge party for the kids. We have a huge sign we are putting up across the street for the kids to run through when they get home, a banner across the fence announcing party central, LOUD music, a blowup water slide, relay games and 600-- yes 600-- otter pops for consumption!

Don't you wish you lived on my street?

Yeah. I thought so.

Catch ya on the flipside!


1. Seattle - Public Image ltd
2. Hand In Glove - The Smiths
3. Why Georgia - John Mayer
4. All Summer Long - Kid Rock
5. Soul Meets Body - Death Cab for Cutie
6. To Be Alone With You - Sufjan Stevens
7. Hysteria - Def Leppard
8. Wonderwall - Ryan Adams
9. Waiting On The World To Change - John Mayer
10. You Get What You Give - New Radicals *summer of 2000!*

Bonus: Walking On The Sun - Smashing Pumpkins *summer of 1998!*


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19 monkeys jumping on the bed:

  1. Kristina P. said...

    I am a fan of Mario Lopez is a Douchbag.

  2. HILLARY said...

    ummm.... i hope you guys didn't sit around and watch the video ;)

    i'm moving to your neighborhood! sounds like a blast. my kids'll be there for the party for sure!!

  3. Larsen's said...

    I love reading your blog!
    I wish that I lived in your neighborhood I would add four more to your party. I guess you have to live in Utah to have a lot of kids in your neighborhood, right?

    I was on facebook, but seriously, there are other things I could be doing besides sending plants and flowers and updating my status all the time. I think it is a little crazy.( I could be reading blogs and working on my own blog, lol)

    Thanks for a great insightful read!

  4. wonder woman said...

    I'm a fan of ignoring everything I get on facebook. Don't take it personally.

    I walk at the butt crack of dawn, too. I go with a friend and we walk at the HS track, but I see people I know all the time. Is why I always swipe on a little mascara and foundation. So vain.

    I always end up with a summer anthem. Past favorite have been Summer of '69 and Soak up the Sun. I don't have one for this year yet, either.....

  5. Mormon Mommy Blogs said...

    Yeah. No video watching here... just listening. I'm not that bad. Usually.

    ~motherboard

  6. Melissa said...

    Where were you when my kids were little so I could have borrowed all your great ideas? Oh yeah, prolly still in middle school.

    Will be tossing flowers and carrying the stupid pager. Good.times.

  7. Erin said...

    I've never heard that Kid Rock song. Where have I been?

    But my kids are singing "The Sweater Song" by Weezer word for word right now.

  8. DeNae said...

    I totally wish we lived on your street. But what if the deranged lunatic teenage driver comes zipping down the road and messes up your banner? See, now you have something to worry about. You're welcome.

    We don't have a summer anthem, unless you call me screeching "STOP DRIPPING ON MY FLOOR! STAY OUT OF THE HOUSE UNTIL YOU'RE DRY! I DON'T CARE IF YOU HAVE TO PEE! YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF THAT BEFORE YOU WENT OUT TO THE POOL SIX HOURS AGO!!" an anthem.

    Then, yes, we have a very nice one, thankyouverymuch.

  9. Missy said...

    You are perfectly funny! I do not do butt crack dawn and am in awe of those who do!

  10. rychelle said...

    i am a fan of sleeping. on facebook. i truly love it that much.

    signed,
    mrs. lazy bones

  11. AS Amber said...

    My MIL calls K Mart "K Marx". And she WORKED THERE!!! And she's a hick.

    That was our summer anthem last year too! DeNae's comment made me laugh.

    And what time's the party?

  12. Me said...

    It must be an age thing. My MIL calls it the WalmartS too! That's what we have to look forward to as we age...

  13. tammy said...

    Rearranging furniture out in the lobby? I think I love you even more. That is something that would totally bug me and I'd have to rearrange it too.

    And that song was totally are theme for last summer and our trip to Lake Powell. Yeah, we're good parents too. At least we didn't have a pole in our boat. And now that I know I'm in the company of you. That makes me feel so much better.

  14. Heidi Ashworth said...

    Walking in the early morning is totally what makes sense to me. Around here, you see people jogging in the late afternoon 100 degree heat. The hotter it is, the more joggers there are. Crazy!

  15. Heather of the EO said...

    This one time, I wanted to say "butt crack of dawn" on my blog and then I thought, "does anyone else besides me say that?"

    Good. I'm not alone.

    You are so naughty with your Kid Rock. (OK, OK...I always turn it up when that song comes on the radio.)

  16. Shawn said...

    Whew! You were on a roll when you did this post!

    I am having hard time knowing which thing to comment on,....so I will just say:

    Looks like you are going to have a great weekend!

  17. Shelle-BlokThoughts said...

    I HATE fan pages also!!! STUPID.

    And I choose a theme song every year that explains, for me, my marriage that year. Weird I know... but it's been fun!

  18. Jo said...

    Did you really rearrange the furniture at church? For reals? You are crazy! But I like it.
    There are NO perks in getting up at the butt crack of dawn, just being tired, that is all there is.

  19. AS Amber said...

    PS, go over and enter my giveaway!