Open Letter

Dear Toshiba,

My new laptop was awesome. It had the sweetest screen I had ever seen. The color was bright and sharp and it had a full keyboard. It came with all the bells and whistles, and I really really loved it.

Why am I using past tense you ask? Because dudes! It doesn't work any more. I've only had it for six weeks. SIX WEEKS is not very long for a computer to stop working.

I may have refrained from sending you this letter, but my interaction with your customer service department negates it. I mean, how do you say? It totally sucks.

When I have to finish the sentences of your employee because they don't speak English? Dude. That's bad. And irritating.

Don't believe me, Mr. Toshiba? Let me give you a small sampling of the hoops I have been jumping through:

Toshiba: Herro. Tank-oo for carring Toshiba.

Me: Uhh. Ok. Is this customer service?

Toshiba: Yah. yah. yah. How can I, uhh... how do you say?

Me: Help me?

Toshiba: Yah. yah. yah. Dat's it. How can I herp you?

Me: My computer isn't working. I believe the pin for the adapter is broken and the LCD screen flickers on and off. I need to get it fixed.

Toshiba: Uhh. Ohhh. {sigh} OK. You need, uhh, how do you say? Uhh...

Me: Use my warranty?

Toshiba: Yah. yah. yah. Dat's it. You want to make craim on your warranty?

Me: Yes. What do you need so that I can get this done?

Toshiba: Werr, I need to have your, uhh... You're uhhh..... How do you say? Your...

Me: Serial number? Maybe? My name maybe?

Toshiba: Yah. yah. yah. You name and den seriar numba.

Me: (oh my hell this is going to take forever)

Toshiba: Ok. Ok. I tink dat's it, how do you say... Uh...

Me: Uh. Wait a minute. How are you going to fix it unless I send it to you? Don't I need to send it somewhere?

Toshiba: Oh yah. yah. yah. OK. yah. Let's see. Yah. Ohh.. {sigh} Yah. You take dat computah, go to da nearest... Uhh..uhh... How you say?

Me: Shipping store? (for the love!)

{bangs head against the wall}

Toshiba: yah. yah. yah. UPS shipping store. I tell you where to go.

Me: Where are you located?

Toshiba: The Philippines.

Me: (well THAT explains a lot)

**

Seriously, Mr. Toshiba. I have to end there, because I feel my blood pressure rising as I type this conversation out. This went on for forty-five minutes. FORTY FIVE MINUTES! For 45 minutes I wanted to bang my head against the wall.

Now, just to set the record straight so you don't call me a racist Mr. Toshiba. I am not. I love all people. I have traveled extensively in your country. I have a degree in Tourism, for Googles sake. I love all people and all races and all places.

I get, Mr. Toshiba, that you want to save money. I also get that you out source your call centers. I don't really care if you do. But seriously? Is it too much to ask that you make sure your employees are fluent in conversational English?

People in China don't want me to come over there and work in their call center's and use my limited, uhh... How do you say? Chinese. They expect to get someone who can speak their language. And so do I.

I also expect that when you tell me to take it somewhere, that the people I am taking it to will have a clue what I'm talking about. You said you would, uhhh... how do you say? Fax them.
Only, you didn't.

Or you did, but it was in Chinese.

Then, after sending it off to get fixed, and literally getting it back the next day... it wasn't fixed. Why? Because they couldn't understand the work order, because, how you say?
IT. WAS. IN. CHINESE!

Lucky me, I then get to get back on the phone with Ho-Chi-Min and try to solve my broken computer problem while trying to help us understand each other again. It's irritating and frustrating to spend-- 3 phone calls later-- over 2 hours on the phone--2 hours I will never get back-- trying to get my damn computer fixed. My computer that is only 6 weeks old.

For the love, Toshiba. I don't care if you want to save a buck, but for Googles sake, make sure your employees can speak conversational English.

That is all.

~motherboard

PS. my computer still isn't fixed. I finally came to my senses and demanded to be transferred to their US offices and talk to a US person to tell me where I can physically drive my computer to be fixed.

They spoke beautiful English.