I was informed last night that I wasn't cool. In fact, I was so NOT cool, that I wouldn't recognize cool if I ran over it with my uncool minivan.

Ouch.

Why? Well. You see I had tickets to go to this concert last night, but Jefe had to do something. Like work and bring in a paycheck. Whatever. I wanted to take my older kids, but what with Jefe's weird need to be "responsible" and all, I had to stay home. I arranged for my parents to take my kids.

I was pretty excited for them. I was dancing around here all afternoon, singing away. My older kids were moping around here pouting. I told them they would have a blast at this concert, cause this group really knows how to put on a great show.

Thing 1 said they must be retarded because she had never even heard of them, and she totally knows what's cool. Thing 2 just shrugged and asked if he could have something to eat. I pulled up a youtube video (what in the sam hill did we ever do before we had youtube?) and started singing along with them, and dancing with Moxie. Moxie was loving it! I dare you to listen to that video and NOT try and dance along with them!

Thing 1 was horrified "Are they really going to dress like THAT??" I told her no. They were older now. So, I showed her THIS video...

Thing 1 got a horrified look on her face and moaned: "Mom! They are old dudes, singing old dude songs!" And, then she promptly broke into tears.

I did what any good, loving, king thoughtful mother would do.
I burst out laughing. Gut busting, tear inducing laughter.
It was the funniest thing I had ever seen. I am SO not a good mother. I know it, so don't be sending me any emails. I'll just print them out and run over them with my uncool minivan.

Because, really. Seeing Thing 1 crying because I was mean enough to make her go to concert where she just might enjoy herself... that is pure, delicious comedy.

Did you have Barbie Dolls? Well. I will see you your barbie doll, and raise you my Donny & Marie Barbie dolls. Complete with the microphones AND purple socks. I know. You are totally jealous.

To say that I am just a little jealous is an understatement. I really wanted to go see the Osmond's. I love the Osmond's! (yes I am totally white, nerdy and uncool! --watch the whole clip-- Donny has a cameo!) I used to watch the Osmond's on T.V.
Oh. You didn't know?
Before their unsuccessful talk show run, they had a great variety show. Much like Sonny & Cher. It was my dream to grow up and sing and dance in their show-- right along side Donny.

The Osmond's were the very first concert I ever went to. I was in Mrs. Manning's 3rd grade class.I found my journal recently and read what I had written about it-- pretty funny. To say that I was in love with Donny is putting it lightly. I was. And still am.
I guess that really does make me white, nerdy, uncool and entirely lame-O.
{{shrugs}} Who cares?!

Moxie can roll over. Yea! Awesome news!
How do I know this? How did I find out you ask? Well you see, it involved Moxie, the couch and some very loud screaming.

Yeah. Mother of the year I'm not.

To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?" you can say, "Sorry, got these sacks." - Jack Handy

Potato Chips
Have you purchased a bag of that sinful goodness lately? I love potato chips... all kinds, all flavors! I actually start getting a little panicky if I don't have tortilla chips + potato chips in the closet. I am kind of on a Salt & Vinegar - Kettle chips kick right now. But, the thing I've noticed is that the price of chips is going up, but the amount they put in the bag keeps getting smaller. I opened a bag today, and it was only half full (or was it half empty?) Grrr. Whats up with that??

Satire
OK. This has been punched around the blog-o-sphere a lot. So, I guess I am late to the party. But, I wondered what you thought. Have you seen THE blog? The one that everyone is talking about? Seriously, so blessed is the one that some people think is sheer genius and satire at its best and others are really upset with it. Have you seen it? I have seen about 7 blogs that have devoted entire posts to this blog. Some love it, some hate it, some are indifferent. I guess I would fall in the indifferent place.

At first reading, I as irritated, and felt like they were making fun of me! Then, after I realized that blog-land does not rotate around MY blog (however much I like to think it does) I realized that it was tongue in cheek humor-- satire, irony. I was curious as to why I was irritated... That is when I realized that this blog had hit upon something that is ironic, and actually quite funny.

I had blogged about various things that were being mocked. I did talk like she blogged (Jefe is constantly correcting me: "Gun-nu is not a word; Mount-uns is not a word; S'go is NOT a word... its deal not dill; steal not still... i know you can come up with more...).

Frankly, when I looked at it like that I thought it was brilliant. If I can't laugh at myself, then I need a reality check. Life is too short to get all upset because someone has decided to capitalize on the idiosyncrasies of being a Utah Mormon. It's tongue in cheek humor. I think if it bugs you that much, then hit the "next blog" button and be on your way. The thing that I found so weird was how heated the comments were getting... It's a blog for Pete's sake. Maybe examine WHY it evokes such emotion?! Its just a blog... A mock-u-blog-u-mentry!
What do you think?

Whining
If I have to hear the words :"Mom, I'm so bored!" one more time I think I may just have a giant freak-out right there on the floor. I will have to start waving my hands above my head like the crazy that I am and run from the room screaming. Because seriously. This is getting absurd. I heard it Tuesday, with giant tears in their eyes, after having been home for only 10 minutes. Ten minutes people. We had been out and about, swimming, playing, ice cream eating... buckets of entertainment thrown at them! If I hadn't been nursing Moxie, the freak-out just may have occurred sooner rather than later!

Teenagers
I like teenagers. Really I do. But, this morning, on my street, there were 2 trucks full of teenagers. That isn't what has me so irritated. Its the fact that these 2 trucks were drag racing down my street.
Yes.
DRAG RACING.
My street is a dead end on both ends people. How do you drag race on a street that dead ends without killing someone?
{{shaking head, muttering}} Drag racing. Are ya kidding me??

T.V.
Summer television is lame. Lame-O with a capital O (is that how that goes?). There is nothing decent on to watch. Not that I watch T.V. or anything. I'm just sayin', if I had wanted to watch T.V., there is nothing worthwhile on to watch(wink wink). Surely I am not the only person who is bored with television this summer.
Am I?
What am I missing?

Random 10 Friday
I had some emails last week asking me how to play Random 10 Friday. What it was and all that jazz. I have been doing Random 10 Friday for almost 3 years now. I saw it on a blog and thought it was great... I found new music to listen to. There are a plethora of blogs out there that do this little diddy. If you happen to have a little widget for it, that would be swell if you would share!

The rules are this: You just put your music playing device on random-- or shuffle-- and write down the first 10 songs that come up... all random like. No fair skipping a song, unless its already come up. I promise not to mock you if you don't mock me! You can either post it in my comments, or on your blog. Its just a nice way to get other ideas of music out there.

Random 10 Friday is how I found Robin Thicke and G.Love & Special Sauce!

So, whatcha listening to?

1. It's Not Over - Daughtry
2. Be Be Your Love - Rachael Yamagata
3. Loved You Out Loud - Rascal Flatts
4. Baby's Got Sauce - G. Love & Special Sauce *yum!*
5. Three More Days - Ray LaMontagne
6. Fire & Rain - James Taylor
7. Shout Out Loud - Amos Lee *my new boyfriend*
8. Complicated - Robin Thicke
9. No Doubling Back (Live) - Jason Mraz *my other boyfriend*
10. Flying - Chris Isaak

Bonus: Say - John Mayer *my other, other boyfriend*

I love a man in a hat. I really wish that men would wear hats... and not just baseball hats, although I do like that as well.
No.
I wish we lived in an area where men wore hats. I love hats. Hats on men and hats on women. I took Jefe some papers a while back downtown and was quite smitten with a gentleman I saw wearing a fedora hat. It is quite stylish. I keep talking to Jefe, trying to convince him to get one. I almost had him convinced this past winter... but we couldn't find one large enough to fit that gigantic brain of his! I won't give up. A fedora hat is a sign, to me, of a man who is confident, knows where he is going, and has style.

Yum.

Anyway, I have totally digressed off the subject... I guess because my Grandpa was wearing a Fedora hat. He never went anywhere without that hat. It was his trade mark-- his style. He had great style, and a wicked sense of humor!

Can you see me over there?? Get out your magnifying glasses. I'll wait. Do you have them? OK. See the one in red? Thats me. Yes. It does say "The Oprah Winfrey Show". These were my best friends when we lived in Chicago and Jefe was in Law School. All our husbands were in one graduate program or another, and we were basically single moms. We called each other the sanity squad.

We got together every single Friday for lunch and let our kids play all afternoon long. Lunch usually started around 11 and we didn't go home until around 5pm. It was a long day... but the best therapy I have ever had.

A couple of us rotated homes on Thursday nights for dinner because our husbands studied late on those nights. We had children the exact same age... they literally were my sanity savers.

We tried for 3 weeks straight to get tickets to Oprah. Do you know how hard it is to get tickets to Oprah??
Really freaking hard!
I was finally able to score some, and it turned out to be Mer's birthday (she is the one in glasses). It was grand fun. We got up early and stood in line for what seemed like an eternity. Afterward, we ate a glorious lunch-- and i remember I was peeved. Not peeved-peeved, just peeved. Because my friends out ordered me... again.

I have this weird thing about really putting a lot of thought into my meal when I order it. I find myself thinking "if this were my last meal, what would I want it to be?"
I know. Totally morbid.
By doing that I always have a tendency to order way too much food too. They out ordered me that day. I hate that!

This is one of my favorite photos of us all. It was a beautiful fall day and the temperature was perfect. A funny story... We were sitting on the very back row in the studio audience when I felt a tap tap tap on my leg. I turned around to see this man staring up at me. He said "That is a beautiful color you are wearing. What do you call it?" I looked at him like he was a little crazy and said "Uhh. Red?!" He said. "Well. That red is stunning. Will you come and sit on the front row?" I looked at my friends (I was torn-- we came together, we should sit together, right?) and promptly said "Sure! Where do I go?"

Yes.

I totally sat on the front row of Oprah. I was so close, that I could have reached out and touched her.

Jealous?
You should be... Only because I had on some MEAN leather pants too. I know. You so wish you could see that, don't you.?!

Thing3: Mom, do you love to shop or what?

Me: No, Thing 3, I actually hate shopping.

Thing3: You do? All kinds of shopping?

Me: Yes. All kinds of shopping. I hate all kinds of shopping.

Thing3: Well. We need to do more shopping, because that is how you keep families together forever. By shopping.

Oh. So that's how that whole eternal family thing works.

"Fra-gee-lay. That must be Italian."
- Mr. Parker in A Christmas Story

Why is it when I get on the phone, that is code to my children to start misbehaving? Is it some sort of secret kid code that I wasn't aware of? Cause, really. I swear they see the phone up to my ear... And there it is... The secret kid code to drive Mom insane. Immediately they think I can carry on 10 conversations at once, and that punching their brother will go unnoticed by me. And really, all I can do is shoot missiles at them with my evil eye and snap my fingers like an insane person.

1. Young Love - Gavin De Graw
2. Speed - Montgomery Gentry
3. Crucify - Tori Amos
4. Realize - Colbie Caillat
5. Listen - Amos Lee
6. I Don't Feel Like Dancin' - Scissor Sisters *another unknown favorite!*
7. Home - Blake Shelton
8. If I Ain't Got You (live) - Alicia Keys
9. Strawberry Swing - Coldplay
10. Colors - Amos Lee

Bonus: Waiting All My Life - Rascal Flatts

. . . And my parents for birthing me, and my Husband for tolerating me... and my children for driving me to the brink of insanity...

What? You didn't hear??
I entered a writing contest with THIS, and figured that would be the end of it. I really liked the topic when Scribbit announced it, because I had just found a photo of myself dressed as Wonder Woman back in the 70's. It was a rockin' costume.

Imagine my complete shock when I opened my email to see that I had won. It was unexpected, and I have been floating on cloud nine. Well, floating and stopping children from fighting, and the dog from stealing their pizza, and nursing Moxie, but floating none the less!

I'm totally stoked for the ZUNE MP3 player. Now I have no excuses for getting my giant-shelf-butt in gear training for that 5k that I have already registered for. That will be exciting to watch, since I get winded just running to the mailbox.

Anyway. I won, and I feel like a million bucks right now. That will wear off as soon as my baby pukes on me again, I'm sure! But, for now... a million bucks, people! A million bucks!

Anyway, have an awesome weekend! I know that I will!

I had someone say to me recently that they wished I would do some more Throwback Thursdays. When I inquired why, they said it was their favorite thing I did... Because it was fun to make fun ofthe pictures. So, for your viewing and comedy pleasure Throwback Thursday returns... I'm easy like that!

This is actually a photo of Thing 1... when she was younger. It was her favorite photo in her scrapbook. She would gleefully get her book, and show everyone including the mailman and his dog her photo. She loved her messy hair. So do I.

I have been trying to organize my photos, and get my office put back together so that I can start scrapbooking again. I haven't done a single page in over 3 years. Poor, poor Thing 3 has only 5 pages in her scrapbook. She keeps asking me where she was when she was a baby. (isn't that sad?) I need to get my giant shelf butt in gear!

I found a bunch of photos from when I was a child... Thing 1 and I have matching hair doos. My hair sometimes looks like this when I wake up still. I get all giddy inside if I wake up and my hair looks good. Then I insist on not fixing it-- and pointing that fact out-- just because usually my hair looks like my head was sucked by an enormous vacuum cleaner all night long.


This last one is of me kissing my baby sister, Loubop. I can remember rushing home from school so that I could hold her and hug her and kiss her. Not unlike my children today do with Moxie. I couldn't get enough of my baby sister... Nor can my children of theirs.

Sisters are a wonderful gift... I am so glad that all my sisters will be here this weekend. It will be fun to have them all around for a few days. We are going to Mama Mia on Saturday... Joy. Rapture!

Madam Queen has this thing on her blog that morphs you into a celebrity. I got all giddy inside because, really, who doesn't want to look like a celebrity?


Are you kidding me??
They said I look like Jeb Bush AND Gary Busey.
Dudes. And dorky dudes at that.
I have never been told I look like dudes before.
Elisabeth Shue yes and Jennifer Grey. But never in my life Jeb or Gary.
Oh.
And I look 50% like Whoopie Goldberg.
Grrreeeaaattt!!!
Ok. I am going to go hide from life now.
Dorky Dudes.
Humph.
Are you kidding me??

1. No internet

2. Moxie is sick.

3. Kids fight.

4. No internet.

5. Moxie is sick.

6. No Internet.

7. Thing 1 goes swimming.

8. Get hopes up for internet.

9. Moxie is sick.

10. Hopes dashed. No internet

11. Thing 3 goes to movies (thanks Sher)

12. Moxie is still sick.

13. Still no internet

14. Thing 2 complains his friends are all on vacation.

15. Dog gets sick

16. Clean carpet

17. No internet

18. Watch movie

19. Moxie STILL sick

20. Finally. Internet.

Blah-ba-dee blah-blah-blah. I'm tired. I'm going to bed.

Last night I was pacing my house like a caged animal. Pacing. Whimpering. Pacing. Wringing my hands. Pacing.

Why?

My Internet was out. Gone. Ka-put. Ceasing to exist. It had been gone all the live long day too.

Why?

Because I have crap-tastic Internet. I have known for several months that my Internet provider was going out of business at the end of July. I know this. I am not OK with this, and apparently begging and pleading will not get them to change this.

I tried on and off all day yesterday to get my Internet to magically come back on. I wiggled cables. I unplugged every stupid cable attached to the computer. I banged the modems on the desk. Nothing. I called Jefe at work and whined to him. Nothing. I would open an internet browser, hoping that maybe my mojo-curse-wielding-voo-doo chanting-magic had worked, and my Internet was back on.

No such luck.

At the end of all this, I was fit to be tied...

Me: “Jefe, seriously, I don't know what to do with myself. How am I supposed to check my email?”

Jefe: “The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem.”

Me: “I do not have a problem. I just want to check my email”.

Jefe: “Addicted.”

Me: “Am not!” Huffing away, wringing my hands and pacing.

I banged and wiggled and jiggled some more. And then went to bed.

I woke up early this morning, and came downstairs and turned the computer on, and tried to access the Internet again. I was hoping that Internet fairies had fixed my Internet problems.

They skipped my house.

Dang fairies.

I repeated my cycle from yesterday. Unplug everything. Bang a few things. Utter some ugly words. Complain to Jefe. Then do the only reasonable thing.. order new Internet.

I called another Internet provider, that actually has faster service than what I have right now. (oh the joy!) I got the little shpeel from the nice Internet lady, and then asked how soon they could be here.

“Next Tuesday”.

crickets chirping

Excuse me?

“Next Tuesday”.

Yeah. Do you see my horror? My shock? I gasped, but said book me for the first thing you have.

We continued on with the order process when she said “Oh my.” (not something you want to hear) “It looks like I was mistaken. I can get someone there this afternoon”

Applause. Applause. Auh-Plause!

No sooner had I hung up with the nice order lady, than the phone rang, and it was the nice Internet man.

Internet Man: Mrs. Motherboard? We have you down for installation this afternoon, but we need to change things.”

(Oh great.)

Me: Really? To what?

Him: Well. How would the next half hour sound to you?

Me: Holy cow! I will totally kiss that worker boy if he comes that fast!

Him: (laughing) Well, Mrs. Motherboard, I am sure he could use a big ole kiss from you today! They will be there within 30 minutes.

Me: I will totally kiss him then!

I mean, holy cow. Talk about ask and ye shall receive...

Imagine my horror, when the doorbell rings not five minutes later. Yes. I am still in my PJ's (be quiet! Its my story) and there, standing on my front porch is the cable boy... ummm, I mean Man.

Now, my kids heard me say that I was going to kiss this guy if he came that fast. I totally would have kissed him... just cause it would have been funny... and my kids would laugh, and I am a total sucker when it comes to making them laugh.

But, then he smiled. And, Oh my gosh people!

He had NO TEETH.

None. Zippo. Zilch.

I did not kiss him.

But I did gush.

A lot.

I gushed, then offered him a cool beverage, then gushed some more.

He proceeded to start working on re-connecting me with the world. I mean, do you even realize how many times a day the Oh. Mighty Google answers your questions?

A lot.

I'm just sayin'.

After about 30 minutes, he comes in the house and hollers “Mrs. Motherboard? I have some bad news.”

Again, not something you want to hear.

Him: “Umm. That cable box, over there in your yard... you see it there? Well. Ummm. Its empty.”

Me: Great! Filler up! Thats what you do, right?

Him: “Umm. Its not that simple. You see, when they did your subdivision, it looks like the forgot to run the wires from that side of the street to this side of the street. Everything is there for it, except the wires. Even your neighbor can't have our Internet. I'm sorry. But you aren't getting Internet today. At least not from us.

Crickets chirping.

(Dog barking in the distance)

What the wuh-wuh??

Him: I know. Its confusing. But, you can't have Internet. At least not from us.

They forgot to run the wires under the street?

What the wuh-wuh?? Are you kidding me? How do you do that?

My new friend was nice. He kept apologizing, and telling me how much it stunk that I couldn't have their Internet, cause by next year, the download time would be 50 times faster than it is right now! (oh my word. Do not tell me that!)

So. We all waved good-bye to the nice Internet man. Thing 1 actually started to cry (I am totally a dealer of Internet crack!) “How will I do my homework? (read: how will I chat with my friends?) She started mumbling under her breath: “This is terrible. Just terrible” and walked away shaking her head.

Every company I have called thus far offers speeds lower than what I have now.

Great!

I am now an Internet junkie, that deals to her children... and I live on the wrong side of the tracks.

How's YOUR day been?

ps. the crap-tastic company happily plugged me back in... that is until the end of the month.

My family has been on some pretty amazing trips together. We have been able to travel pretty much all over the world. My parents did a wonderful thing by taking us all around the world... The world came alive to me because of this. Yet, my memories of these travels always include me being car sick.

Jefe says I can mark my travels by where I have thrown up. Sadly, he's right. I've thrown up over the bridge into the Chicago river; On a sightseeing cruise in San Fransisco Bay; On a street corner in London; A long, winding road in Scotland (isn't that a Beetles song?); On a boat in Hong Kong and by the side of the road in Washington state. Just to name a few. Gross huh?

I have spent the majority of these travels of ours with my head hanging out the window... hoping I wouldn't toss my cookies--- yet again. It was on one of these dreaded carsick moments that my sisters pulled the best prank on me ever. I had my head hanging out the window, thinking death would surely be better than this. When ima10cow told me that I should spit. It would make me feel better. Yeah. You see where this is going, right? I asked her what she was talking about. She again told me to spit... that something awesome would happen, and I would probably feel better.

Suddenly, all my sisters started egging me on. “Yeah, Motherboard! You should totally spit. You will feel better, and its totally awesome when you do!” Me protesting. Them egging me on. Over and over, round and round we went. I seem to recall even my parents got in on this one!

So, what did I do?
I spit.
And, boy did I spit good!
I know.
Gross.
Something totally awesome DID happen . . . the spit came back and hit me in the face.

But, I wasn't carsick anymore either.

Go check out my good friend Sher. She is having a music giveaway on her blog. We both do this little feature called Random 10 Friday on our blogs... Your suppose to put your playlist on random, and then write down the first 10 things that come up. I usually just see what the title is, then hit next. Now, I do say suppose to because, ahem... I still have Christmas music on my player, and the Wiggles, and (kringing as I say this) an embarrassing amount of Disco. Sometimes, not very often, I hit FF because there has been 1 too many Wiggles, Christmas and Disco come up. Only sometimes!

Anyway.
She is doing a giveaway... and if I know Sher, like I know Sher, it will be a good one! As a shout-out to Sherrie-- she is one of the most amazing musicians you will ever meet! She plays the piano with a passion that I have never seen before-- and she is amazing. She takes music and arranges it to be "just what we were needing". She can sing better than anyone I know-- and I know quite a few singers. (well, not famous ones anyway-- but I have met Donny Osmond and his clan if that counts!) She is inspiring, incredible and amazing all rolled up into a little spit-fire of a friend. She has saved my caboose more times then I would care to admit!

So, go play her Random 10 Friday game, and then give her some comment lovin'!
You just may be the winner extraordinaire!

I have been listening to Amos Lee for years. He is an artist that has flown completely under the radar, and his backup singer /piano player from his debut album is more famous than he is. She sings back up on several of his tracks. He is able to blend blues, soul, jazz and folk in such a natural way. He is reminiscent of Jack Johnson, or John Mayer and his voice reminds me of a cool Midwestern evening. I know. That sounds weird, but whenever I listen to him. . . my mind wanders to warm evenings in the Midwest, with fireflies blinking and the sun slowly setting. I can see it in my minds eye-- even though it has never happened. He paints vibrant pictures with his music. It is the kind of music that causes me to contemplate and think, and it is wonderful driving music--music that compels me to write--memory inducing music.



I remember hearing him on David Letterman a few years ago, and being quite excited! Then, lately, there has been an AT&T commercial that has his song Sweet Pea on it. It didn't click that it was Amos until I was listening to his album again. He played on Austin City Limits (!) -- which I would give my eye teeth to see! He has also been featured on episodes of The House, Studio 60, Just Like Heaven, Six Degrees, ER and the season finale of Greys Anatomy.

I love his songs Shout Out, Colors, Careless and Southern Girl. In all honesty, I would be hard pressed to say which of his many songs are my favorite. They all play easy on my ears, and are subtle, simple, sultry and superb!

Give him a listen and see if you don't fall madly in love as well.

If God dwells inside us like some people say, I sure hope He likes enchiladas, because that's what He's getting! - Jack Handy

Breakfast
Imagine my shock, when I asked my children what they wanted for breakfast, they actually responded. As if I were a waitress/short order cook. "Yes, Thank you. I'll have a pancake for breakfast, he'll have eggs and toast, and she wants a tuna sandwich and macaroni and cheese."

*screech*

*crickets chirping*

*a dog barking in the distance*

Did you say Macaroni & Cheese and Tuna fish??
For breakfast? That's just weird.

Seasons
Why does it seem that we have moved past having 4 seasons? Have you noticed that? Look around, its true. We only have 2 seasons now. Winter and Road-under-construction. Do you notice it now? Its true. Everywhere I go, there is a road under construction. It feels like the universe is out to get me. . . How can we triple the travel time of Motherboard and make her go stark raving mad?? Oh! I know! Construction!!
ding ding ding.
I know I posted about my "zen moment" earlier... but its just getting a little ridiculous now.

Teenager speak
When did "so, Yeah" become punctuation? I know that I have used it here. On occasion, and I hide my head in shame. But, really. When did the punctuation rules change? I never got that memo.

I like some of the phrases that they use. . . in an eye twitching sort of way. Have you heard them lately?
Wizard = Cool!
Fo shizzle dizzle = for sure! yeah that's great!
Just the other day I used the word Bling.
Bling bling. I will be honest. I actually had to look that one up when I started hearing that. Now, I just look flat out dumbfounded as I ask the teenagers-- "what in the SAM-HILL are you talking about? All I heard was: "aksdjfkajoijfljkjdkf boys ajsdkfjlajlskdjflj".
They always laugh "Oh Motherboard! Yer soo funny!"

I guess this is a sign that I am "fo sho" getting "C.T.D" or circling the drain.
Sigh.
Thank Heavens for THIS site to translate what they are saying!

Language has sure changed since I was a teenager. . . "Hun! Nut-uhh! Like don't have a cow, but that Dude was totally checkin' you out!! Gross me out to the max!"
Remember those days? What kinds of things did you say?

Comments
I like comments. A lot. My friend told me recently that there is nothing better than waking up and having comments in your email. I couldn't agree more. I love it when I open my email, and Wowzas!
Lookie there... I have 5 comments on my blog!
Shazam!
Have you seen the blogs that have like 300+ comments? I have. Pioneer woman consistently has 20k plus comments. That's 20,000.
How? I want to know.
I certainly DO NOT base my self esteem on my comment love. That's absurd. But, comment love is nice.
I see you there... lurking. Why are you not talking to me?
Come on.
Puh-leeeze!
De-lurk and leave me a comment. I don't bite, and I don't stink...at least I don't think. . . Hey! That rhymed!
We could be friends. Really, we could! Wouldn't that be fun?? And not in some creepy-internet- stalkerish-sort of way either!

So there we have it. My randomness for today. What came up all random like on your ipod today? Or mp3 player... or radio... or whatever you listen to, besides Scooby Doo and your kids fighting?

1. Feel Good - Gorillaz
2. Here - Rascal Flatts
3. Strawberry Swing - Coldplay
4. Mockingbird - Ryan Adams
5. O. Lover - Jason Mraz
6. Stop This Train - John Mayer
7. Keep It Loose, Keep It Tight - Amos Lee *he is my new favorite!*
8. The Little Things - Colbie Calliat
9. If You Ever Stop Loving Me - Montgomery Gentry
10. A-Punk - Vampire Weekend

Bonus: Hey Lady (live) - Thriving Ivory

When my kids were much smaller, I had had a particularly rough day, and decided to pack everyone up and head to Wal-Mart. Thing 1 was probably about 4 and Thing 2 was about 16 months old. I got us all dressed, even fixing Thing 1's hair. She looked darling, and Thing 2 looked cute! I THOUGHT we all looked pretty good. We were trolling into Wal-Mart and everyone was sort of staring at us. I THOUGHT they were all thinking "Oh look at those 2 cute kids, and wow! That Mom is really put together." This went on for quite a while. People looking, staring, talking. Me feeling pretty slick cause I had overcome my horrid day. Then I went into the dressing room to try something on, and looked at myself in the mirror...
People had definitely been pointing and talking about me... but not because I had my act SOO put together, or because I had such darling kiddies.
Nope.
They had been staring at me because I had my shirt on inside out and backwards.

A while back, Jefe and I were watching TV together. It has become a regular past time of ours. Actually, if I were honest with you, it was Jefe watching TV and me -- listening with my eyes closed (read: sleeping). Do you do that? I do it. A lot.

I was on my end of the couch, listening-- and stewing. I was convinced that everyone in our home had issues. The dog had self esteem issues; Thing 3 had anger issues; Thing 2 had communication issues; Thing1 had teenager issues and I had food issues. Issues. I like that word. Issues. Issues issues issues... and then we all fell down.

The parents on the TV show were having some issues with their family and I perked right up!

Me:"Jefe, we should totally do what they are doing. It might help our family."

Silence.

Me: "Don't you think what they are doing with their kids is a great idea? We should do that!"

Silence.

Me: "El Jefe! Did you hear me? We should do that with our kids."

Jefe: "Umm. No."

Me: "Gasp! Are you kidding me? You don't want to do that with our children? Don't you love our children? This would totally solve our problems, I think." (another issue rearing its ugly head...)

Jefe: "No."

Me: "What is wrong with you? We should completely copy what they are doing. It's working... Look!"

(Jefe stares at me, sighs and keeps watching TV)

Me: Jefe. For reals. Why not??

Jefe: pausing the TV (praise Allah for DVR's) and doing a full body turn to see me.. "Are you serious about wanting to follow their parenting advice?"

Me: "Yes!" (cross off the last issue...) "Look at how great its working out for them!"

Jefe: Sigh. "Motherboard, we are not going to take our parenting cues from The Sopranos. They are socio-paths."

Oh. Right.

Go Check out The Robins Nest... she is having a giveaway that is superb!

I love to watch movies. My mission companions & I used to play this movie game where we would say a line from a movie, then everyone had to guess what movie it was from. Whomever would guess correctly would then have to pick a word from the last quote and find a movie with that word in it. I know. It sounds complicated, but its not. It's a blast!

Go play Robins game, and then enter her contest!

I love Discovery Channel. Don't you? Pretty much everything on there is noteworthy! Have you been to the Discovery Kids Website yet?
NO?
Oh you must! Its wonderful! And then there is the Discovery Education website where you can make your own puzzles.
Yup!
Make your own puzzles. I go there a lot and make word searches and cross word puzzles for the kids to do centered around themes. I have made church ones to do at church as well. I love these sites! Check them out... your kids will thank you!

Did you listen to the video up there?
You should! You will totally be singing that song all day.

You're welcome.

My friend, Lori, over at Morning Glories and Moonflowers gave me this lovely award! She is absolutely amazing and talented beyond belief when it comes to making jewelry! You need to check out her blog, and then click even faster over to her etsy shop! Her stuff is awesome!

I won a lovely necklace from her, and then had her make me a bracelet to match! I couldn't wait to get it here to wear it . . . and I will have to keep on waiting . . . seeing how Thing1 fell madly in love with them and took them on her little jaunt up to the great white north. But, she did tell me that she has gotten more compliments on that set than anything else she has ever worn! Good job, Lori!

The thing that is so awesome about blogging, is that you get to make all sorts of friends. Jefe likes to call them my imaginary friends. But, whether I see you or not, I do consider you my friends. Part of the award says that I have to choose 7 of you to pass the blog love on to. My goodness. That's hard!

I say, (and I am totally cheating here) that if you want this award, then by all means please have it! I thoroughly enjoy reading all your blogs. They make me laugh until I cry. They make me introspective, and grateful. This connecting to you all through blogland is better than therapy. And, I mean that in a nice way!

But, I want to make sure that the following people get the award FOR SURE:
1. Sherrie
2. Ashley
3. Nicole
4. Frumpy Love
5. Alyssa
6. Merrianne
7. Tracy's Treehouse *because maybe this will motivate her to post something new on her blog!! :>)
8. Colene
9. Harmony
10. My Happy Place (thats you Shelley!)

Here are the rules:
1. Post the logo on your blog.
2. Add a link to the person who nominated you.
3. Nominate 7 other people for this award and add links to their blog.
4. Leave a message for the people that you nominated!

So.
Off with you all now.
Don't forget your blog bling.
And, remember to share the blog love and send this baby out there!

I remember the first time I heard this song. I was living in Jan's parents house on my mission. My companion and I were in their family room with the door shut, reading our scriptures. Her parents were in the kitchen, watching GMA, and Trisha Yearwood was the performer that day. As she sang this song, my companion and I stopped what we were doing, sat and looked at each other and listened. For those few moments that we were silent-- listening-- it seemed as though time had stopped for us.

That memory is seared into my brain. When the song was over, I gave a silent clap and my companion and I both agreed that it was beautiful... and so very true. Songs really do remember when. I wonder if she remembers that moment when she hears this song. And further, I wonder if it is as vivid of a memory for her as it is for me.

Isn't that the way it is though? Sounds, smells, and photos-- they all have the ability to trigger memories. At least for me they do.

When I get a whiff of coffee, floating through the air-- especially McDonald's coffee , or I hear the CNN Headline News music, I think of the Airport. Any airport really, it doesn't matter. The smells and music trigger the memories of traveling.

When the aroma of bus fumes (eww gross. I know) catch my nose, I immediately think of Mexico City... and the time I spent there with my Dad.

When I smell cigarette smoke (far away from me, if you please), I remember the endless summer nights when I would go and stay with my Grandparents. My grandfather was a smoker, and would sit on the porch and smoke. When I smell that smell-- I get this warm feeling and I see him... Sitting there on his front steps smoking, watching the sunset.

If there is chlorine in the air, I think of my old house in Illinois; and the smell of anything grilling brings me to my happy place.

I guess that is why I really like this whole Soundtrack Sunday thing. The music triggers memories. But, so do smells and images. I want to capture those moments, those memories, and sear them into my brain. I want to pass them on to my children. So that when they hear, see or smell something-- they will remember too.

Thing 1 took off to the great white north yesterday to spend 2 weeks with my sister. Islandmom invited her to come up to spend a week playing with her daughter, and then the 2 of them could go off to girls camp together. It has been a great motivator for Thing 1-- to earn money and to “tow the line”.

She was, however, very nervous to fly all alone. She was afraid that a big, stinky, hairy fat man would sit by her... and then proceed to hit on her. I didn't want to dash her “hopes”... but seriously. She IS only 12!

I was trying to be the big, brave Mommy... sending my offspring off into the sunset. Alone.
Without any adult around.
And I did OK... that is until she turned the corner in the walkway, and I couldn't see her any longer. The flood gates opened, and I started crying like a baby. Did you see me there? Yeah. That was me. I was the crazylady, with a 3 month old strapped to me, crying her eyes out. I am sure we looked quite the sight!

A lady, who put her 2 kids on the same flight, must have felt sorry for me. She tried her hardest to comfort me, but it just made me feel like an even bigger dork than I already did. She had the stewardess go and put Thing 1 with her children... so that they could all entertain each other. I am sure Thing 1 thought this was wonderful... seeing how this lady had a 14 year old son.

Ooo! La la!

I worried about her all afternoon. We had arranged for my sister to pick her up-- right at the gate. But, what if something went wrong? What if she got lost? Or worse, what if she fell off the plane? (hey! It could happen!) What if... what if... what if...

We had made all the necessary preparations, and she knew what she was supposed to do, and where the meeting points were. She had the knowledge, the tools, and the skills... everything she needed for her to succeed. Yet, I was still a complete mess. I was terrified something terrible was going to happen to her.

I thought about how, literally in 6 years, she could be heading off again. For good. That really got me crying buckets.

As I was heading down this ugly cry road, I had an interesting thought pop into my head. It was: “This is how I feel about you, Motherboard.”

The light bulb went on, and I realized my Heavenly Father knew exactly how I felt. He had the same worries about ME. The same fears. What if I didn't make it back to him? He was just as worried. I had all the knowledge, the tools and the skills necessary to return to Him. Yet, terrible things COULD happen. And, they probably would. Things that no one has any control over. No life is free from trials. Heck, I could still screw up. I could still make that “wrong turn”, and not connect with Him where I am supposed to.

I remember my friends husband-- who is a pilot-- telling me once that an airplane has a set take off point and a set destination. Sometimes those take off and arrival times change... but the destination is always the same. Then he explained to me that when the plane is flying, it is never flying in a straight line. There is always someone there gently guiding it back on course.

That is exactly the way it is with us. We have that set destination, and we do have someone gently guiding us back on course... we just have to listen.

Suddenly, the fear I was feeling for Thing 1 and her flight to the great white north lessened. I was no longer afraid... just thoughtful. Thoughtful about our journey here on earth.

And, I felt like I heard that gentle voice telling me that maybe I really was on the right course.

My sister, islandmom, posted this hilarious post about my Dad. Go check it out HERE. I died laughing, and in my minds eye could totally see the "eye rolling"! And really, My Dad must be the only guy on the entire planet who doesn't know who she is!
Aren't you dying now to know what I'm talking about?
Go read it!
Really!