Wo Wo Wo! Unto the crazy boxer dog.
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
My dog does a freak-out dance every morning when its time for the kids to leave for school. I try to put her outside for her potty breaks about the time that they are all leaving to catch the bus. However, this morning I didn't. I just put her in her "room" or in other words, my office. She likes to perch herself on my little window seat in there and watch the world go by.
Apparently, being locked in the office, and then forgotten about really pissed her off, because this is what I found when I remembered that I had locked her in her room.
This photo does NOT do this mess justice.
But, you see the thing is this: I love this dumb neurotic, crazy dog. She is great company not only for me but for the kids as well. She follows us all around like a loyal friend should. She has had cancer 4 times-- with the latest bout being in her eyes and blood. She is slowly going blind and is quite literally on her last leg. It won't be long before my devoted canine friend will be heading off to greener pastures in the sky, with endless amounts of cable wiring to chew.
So, that nasty mess she made in my office? Yeah. I'll take it any day. Because that means she is still around for me and the family to love.
Apparently, being locked in the office, and then forgotten about really pissed her off, because this is what I found when I remembered that I had locked her in her room.
This photo does NOT do this mess justice.Now mind you, this room was spotless. SPOTLESS when I put her in there. She ripped open a jumbo box of diapers from Costco and threw them around. Then tore into the jumbo box of bum wipes from Costco and then the individual packages of bum wipes too. Then she ripped open my Mentholatum laced Kleenex's AND my pedicure kit from one of my friends (so that THIS won't happen ever again).
Notice the basket there? On its side? Yeah. That was for Moxie's toys so that she would have something to play with when I was messing around on the computer. Well, she tore it apart. And, she tried to eat my hand lotion. I will never have to open it again. Thank you Crazy Boxer Dog. She conveniently punctured holes in it for me. All I have to do is just squeeze it and lotion squirts everywhere for me.
Yeah.
Good times.
What you don't know is that all this stuff was in the closet.
IN THE CLOSET PEOPLE!
She pulled it out of the closet and then proceeded to have a hay-day. Remember that movie Open Season? When Bog and Elliot go to the convenience store to get more woo-hoos? And then they go completely crazy? (It starts at 2:08)
Umm. Yeah.
That was my dog this morning...
Only it was in my office.
And it involved diapers, bum wipes, Mentholatum laced tissues, lotion and a wicker basket.
The thing is, she is crazy. Crazy sometimes is a good thing, and sometimes not so much. She fits right in here at Crazyland. She has obnoxious allergies-- just like me. She snores in her sleep just like Jefe. She's great with my kids, but hates all the neighborhood kids. She LOVES Moxie to pieces, and lets her crawl all over her, and pull her hair.
She has chewed the A/C wiring twice and the wiring on the inside of the house for the cable TV. We were sitting there watching TV when it suddenly went fuzzy. I looked over and the dog had completely chewed threw the wiring.
She chewed the wiring for the pool pump-- and actually got zapped. She also chewed the outside wiring for the cable 5 times. Yes. You read that right. Five times I had to explain to the nice cable man about my neurotic dog. After the third time, I kept getting the same guy, who also had boxers. (I'm sure he was like "the crazy dog lady? Yeah. I'll take that call!) He was sympathetic. Especially when he had to come to my house twice-- in one day. After the 5th time he told me "Listen. Your dog is going to keep doing this (after she had not only pulled ALL of the wiring OUT of the house, but pulled it up across the entire freaking yard), so here's what I'm going to do for you. I am going to rewire your entire house, and bury the wiring in a completely different place. She will never find it again. AND I won't charge you either. Cause my dog is as nutso as yours."
She had gotten a lot better after she "out grew her puppy phase" but then Moxie came along. She has since decided that reverting back to her naughty puppy ways would be just grand fun! Oh my.
She likes to argue with me about going outside to use the facilities. She does not play or share well with other doggies but she does share well with Moxie. She loves Moxie's cookies and she LOVES Moxies bum cream.
Notice the basket there? On its side? Yeah. That was for Moxie's toys so that she would have something to play with when I was messing around on the computer. Well, she tore it apart. And, she tried to eat my hand lotion. I will never have to open it again. Thank you Crazy Boxer Dog. She conveniently punctured holes in it for me. All I have to do is just squeeze it and lotion squirts everywhere for me.
Yeah.
Good times.
What you don't know is that all this stuff was in the closet.
IN THE CLOSET PEOPLE!
She pulled it out of the closet and then proceeded to have a hay-day. Remember that movie Open Season? When Bog and Elliot go to the convenience store to get more woo-hoos? And then they go completely crazy? (It starts at 2:08)
Umm. Yeah.
That was my dog this morning...
Only it was in my office.
And it involved diapers, bum wipes, Mentholatum laced tissues, lotion and a wicker basket.
The thing is, she is crazy. Crazy sometimes is a good thing, and sometimes not so much. She fits right in here at Crazyland. She has obnoxious allergies-- just like me. She snores in her sleep just like Jefe. She's great with my kids, but hates all the neighborhood kids. She LOVES Moxie to pieces, and lets her crawl all over her, and pull her hair.
She has chewed the A/C wiring twice and the wiring on the inside of the house for the cable TV. We were sitting there watching TV when it suddenly went fuzzy. I looked over and the dog had completely chewed threw the wiring.
She chewed the wiring for the pool pump-- and actually got zapped. She also chewed the outside wiring for the cable 5 times. Yes. You read that right. Five times I had to explain to the nice cable man about my neurotic dog. After the third time, I kept getting the same guy, who also had boxers. (I'm sure he was like "the crazy dog lady? Yeah. I'll take that call!) He was sympathetic. Especially when he had to come to my house twice-- in one day. After the 5th time he told me "Listen. Your dog is going to keep doing this (after she had not only pulled ALL of the wiring OUT of the house, but pulled it up across the entire freaking yard), so here's what I'm going to do for you. I am going to rewire your entire house, and bury the wiring in a completely different place. She will never find it again. AND I won't charge you either. Cause my dog is as nutso as yours."
She had gotten a lot better after she "out grew her puppy phase" but then Moxie came along. She has since decided that reverting back to her naughty puppy ways would be just grand fun! Oh my.
She likes to argue with me about going outside to use the facilities. She does not play or share well with other doggies but she does share well with Moxie. She loves Moxie's cookies and she LOVES Moxies bum cream.
But, you see the thing is this: I love this dumb neurotic, crazy dog. She is great company not only for me but for the kids as well. She follows us all around like a loyal friend should. She has had cancer 4 times-- with the latest bout being in her eyes and blood. She is slowly going blind and is quite literally on her last leg. It won't be long before my devoted canine friend will be heading off to greener pastures in the sky, with endless amounts of cable wiring to chew.
So, that nasty mess she made in my office? Yeah. I'll take it any day. Because that means she is still around for me and the family to love.
