Reason #2,863 why I will not be Mother of the year...
Friday, November 14, 2008
I left Thing 2 home yesterday-- alone-- playing with his friends outside while I went and got Thing1 from school. That's not a terrible thing... he's 10 for Pete's sake. When I drove up, they were on their bellies in the front yard, doing what looked to me like a grass examination.
Me: Dude, whatcha doin?
T2: Well. We were throwing our pocket knives at the grass, and lost one of them.
Me: {{stunned}} You were doing what?
T2: Throwing knives. It was pretty cool.
Me: Uhh. Yeah. I bet it was. Don't do it again... and good luck finding that pocket knife in this sea of grass...
That would merit CPS, but the glory of my wicked awesome parenting skills doesn't end there.
Nope.
I *should* have taken the pocket knives away... but doing that would have meant I was a candidate for Mother of the year. Which we all know I'm not.
I was later inside, sitting on the couch talking on the phone to Jefe. We were discussing the possibilities for world peace, the meaning of life or some other important issue when I saw something out of the corner of my eye. I look out front, to see Thing2 running with an OPEN pocket knife-- and whilst running throwing the pocket knife at the ground. Then running past, laughing maniacally.
Trailing behind was my cute Thing 3 cheering wildly.
I sort of freaked out, ran outside to have another convo...
Me: Dude! Did you join the Circus?
T2: No.
Me: Yeah. I didn't think so. Circus performers are the only ones allowed to throw knives around here. Unless you have suddenly joined a traveling troupe, hand over the knives.
T2: {{looking at his friend}} That would be a fun job!
Grreeeaaat!
My kid, the circus performer. He's got the skillz... spit balling and knife throwing... he'll be wicked awesome!
Me: Dude, whatcha doin?
T2: Well. We were throwing our pocket knives at the grass, and lost one of them.
Me: {{stunned}} You were doing what?
T2: Throwing knives. It was pretty cool.
Me: Uhh. Yeah. I bet it was. Don't do it again... and good luck finding that pocket knife in this sea of grass...
That would merit CPS, but the glory of my wicked awesome parenting skills doesn't end there.
Nope.
I *should* have taken the pocket knives away... but doing that would have meant I was a candidate for Mother of the year. Which we all know I'm not.
I was later inside, sitting on the couch talking on the phone to Jefe. We were discussing the possibilities for world peace, the meaning of life or some other important issue when I saw something out of the corner of my eye. I look out front, to see Thing2 running with an OPEN pocket knife-- and whilst running throwing the pocket knife at the ground. Then running past, laughing maniacally.
Trailing behind was my cute Thing 3 cheering wildly.
I sort of freaked out, ran outside to have another convo...
Me: Dude! Did you join the Circus?
T2: No.
Me: Yeah. I didn't think so. Circus performers are the only ones allowed to throw knives around here. Unless you have suddenly joined a traveling troupe, hand over the knives.
T2: {{looking at his friend}} That would be a fun job!
Grreeeaaat!
My kid, the circus performer. He's got the skillz... spit balling and knife throwing... he'll be wicked awesome!
